Oh hai
February 24, 2008 · Filed under: Personal.
Just dropping by real quick to say thank you to those of you who wished me good luck. You guys are the polar opposite of those I know back home, and I sincerely thank you for your e-support.
So I’m here, and loving every second. I’m still in a state of shock. I’ve thought of doing this so long, it’s almost like I’m not really here. Like I’m watching this entire thing happen in some bubble. I feel mostly cautious, which always happens when I’m confronted with something new, so I’m just waiting until I can shake myself out of it.
Most of my stuff is on its way here, so I feel a little incomplete, but it should be here soon. Right now my main concern is a job, so if you could please send those positive vibes from the last post into this one, I’d really appreciate it. Prayer, chanting, money, etc. is also appreciated.
Oh, and as far as chasing my dreams, and doing what I set out to do, being brave, and all that good stuff—I really can’t take all the credit. If it wasn’t for this papisongo I probably wouldn’t be here. So really, the credit is all his.
Talk to you soon.
Grabbing life by the balls
February 21, 2008 · Filed under: Personal.
So tomorrow this whole process of being on my own will finally begin.
I’ve always had a plan for my future; a path I set for myself. A few months ago I was enrolled in school, had a part-time job that paid the bills, and was headed in what I thought was the right direction. But I was wrong. I wasn’t happy, my situation at home with my parents wasn’t getting any better, and I felt so suffocated. That’s the only way I can explain it. I felt suffocated, stuck in this rut that was supposed to be right for me, but just wasn’t. Just because it works for one person doesn’t mean it works for everyone.
So I made the hardest decision I’ve made in my short twenty years: I quit school to get a full time job, with the intention of finally moving out on my own. And I did it. I saved my money and hopped on this roller coaster I never saw myself riding. But I’m here now, and so far, I don’t want to get off any time soon.
I’ve been told what I’m doing is crazy, irresponsible, a threat to my future, or just a plain bad idea. My parents have been against it from the start. I haven’t had their full support, and I don’t expect to have it for a while. But this is my life. These are my choices. And ultimately, they’ll affect me, and not other people.
I’m tired of planning. I want to do. I’m tired of saying “One day I’ll...” or “I hope that someday I can...” I’m tired of sitting here dreaming without change. I’m tired of waiting for tomorrow when I can just do what I can today. I’ve realized that if you want to be happy, if you want change, it’s all in your hands. Don’t sit and wait for it, because it won’t come on its own.
That’s not to say I’m not scared. I’m scared shitless, but I’m as ready as I can possibly be. At this moment I’m just hoping that if I do hit roadblocks, I’m ready to take them out on my own, and continue this little ride I’m on. And if it doesn’t work out, then at least I can say I tried my best. I can say I got a chance to go on this ride, and that I have no regrets. I attempted what others only dream of doing—chasing their dreams regardless of what others might think. That’s all I can ask for.
Wish us luck.
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