Productivity Blogs And Why They Suck

I subscribe to websites such as Digg and Reddit to keep up with what’s interesting on the internet. Most of the time I’m only interested in 20% of the “popular posts” and it’s a miracle I even stumble upon them because the really good posts are usually hidden between all of the other crap. In the past two months or so I’ve noticed a trend: productivity blogs and their wisdom. Blogs that teach you how to organizing ideas, how to finance, how to stop procrastinating, etc. I used to click on these posts all the time, because who doesn’t want to learn tips on how to be more productive? Needless to say, I wasted a lot of precious time.

While browsing I discovered two major trends in these “productivity” websites:

They Always Have A Catchy Title

And by catchy I actually mean ridiculous. Take a few of these for example (actual titles in the past month or so found in various blogs):

“5 ways to make money without selling your body”
“The answers to life is in this post”
“How to change your life in 60 seconds”
“Lower Your Standards to Free Up Time and Gain Balance”

What a way to lure potential readers! Who doesn’t want to learn “5 Ways To Make Money Without Selling Your Body”? Since we all resort to prostitution to stay afloat and all. No more need for random blowjobs behind a dumpster! Productivity Genius has not one, not two, but FIVE solutions for us! Wanna know what they are? Good, because I do too:

1. Set up a course. (Insert text here about setting up an online internet course about the Internet.)
2. Teach your skills. (No mention of Fellatio 101 in here, I’m confused.)
3. Write for money. (He gives an example of writing 15 articles for $100, the going rate at the moment for an hour long lap dance. Hmm, which would you rather do: dance for an hour or write for three?)
4. Cold calling. (Become an annoying telemarketer! Ey, don’t look at me like that, at least you’d have your “dignity”.)
5. Become an estate agent. (Right, right. Will do.)

These titles are easy to ignore when I’m browsing, so I don’t mind them because I can easily avoid them. I’m not interested in learning “5 Ways To Make Money Without Selling Your Body” since prostitution works just fine for me (and you too). However, some people do get lured in, and that brings me to the next point.

The “Advice” Is Nothing More Than Common Sense

Take this one article: “Why is it so Hard to Change?” Sounds like a question we want answered, right? Who doesn’t want to change their horrible habits? Super Wise Blogger has this answer for us:

1. Identify the thing you want to change about yourself
2. Decide to change it
3. Garner help and information from other people who have successfully made the same change
4. Build and execute a plan of action using this information and the help of others
5. If you fail, go back to step #3, tweak your plan, and repeat until you produce the desired results.

Oh, okay. So I just find what’s wrong, decide to change it (very important step), ask people how they did it, and then build and execute a plan of action. So easy, in fact, that I’m just going to do it later. And by later I mean never, because I know it’s not that easy, it’s not that simple, and gaspshocknoway, it takes a lot more than just “building and executing” a plan.

Here’s another insightful article: “A Simple Way to Improve Your Life Everyday”. I want to improve my life, of course (who doesn’t?). According to this article, it’s actually quite easy:

To put this concept into practice, what I do is ensuring that I do something to improve each facet everyday. Here is how I do it:
1. Decide on something to do daily in each facet
2. Record your performance
3. Adjust accordingly

Why thank you, Captain Obvious. No really. If you hadn’t told me to “decide on something to do” (this is first step is apparently very popular when it comes to productivity) I probably would have never thought of it.

It’s so easy to write “Adjust accordingly” and “Repeat until it works out for you,” but sometimes, that takes time. Time people don’t have because they’re off prostituting themselves. You understand.

Finally, I’d like to point out that it’s not only the advice that is common sense, but the title itself should give you a hint that it’s pointless to read on. For example:

“How to Not Screw Up Your New Job”
“33 Tips to Become a Well Liked Person”
“How to Actually Execute Your To-Do List: (or, Why Writing It Down Doesn’t Actually Get It Done)”
“Why You Should Write Things Down”
“How to Make True Friends”
“How to Accept Criticism”

I don’t know about you, but I know “How to Not Screw Up Your New Job.” It’s common sense: Show up for work and then do my work. I also know that “Writing It Down Doesn’t Actually Get It Done” because a to-do list is a list to do things. I know, it was a shocker for me too.

“33 Tips to Become a Well Liked Person” just tickles me because how short of an article would that be? There are only two rules, and I’ll be nice enough to share them with you: 1) Don’t be an asshole, and 2) Don’t Forget the First Rule. Simple, right? Maybe I should start my own productivity blog…

The thing that gets me about these blogs is that they’re incredibly popular (I’m talking about 50,000 readers subscribed), and bloggers live off of these articles because of the numerous ads plastered all over their websites. Granted, some of their articles are in-depth and educational, and yes, in the past I’ve learned a lot, but I can’t help but think: are people this dense? Do they really need help on “How To Make True Friends”? Do people not know how to accept criticsm and how to be a well liked person? I’m hoping they’re a lot smarter than that but every time these articles get Digg’ed by hundreds of people, I just can’t help but wonder.

P.S. If you want the links to the actual articles, I have them. Send me an e-mail: spicmachine[@]gmail.com.

Posted by on 04/10 at 02:12 PM

This is not limited to productivity websites. The code I give out: nothing more than common sense. The security advice: nothing more than common sense. The marvellous insights of the php ninja? Nothing more than common sense.

Unfortunately, except for me and other bloggers who depend on it, most people are incapable of thinking for themselves. Some are capable of thinking for themselves but are too lazy to do it, or too lazy to do enough research to get to the stage of needing the common sense.

The amusing (ironic?) thing of course is that my post for tomorrow (pre-drafted today) is about productivity ;)

Posted by Jem 04/10

Hahaha, your post is so funny. Productive or not, your blog is one of the few who makes me laugh. There’s so much stupidity around nowadays that it seems people have lost insight, or that everyone have really checked out from reality.
I love how you have this ability to find these articles and samples of human “pavadas” and make what it could be a rather boring entry one that’s funny to read.

Now, about these articles it reminds when those self proclaimed self help gurus make millions out of idiots who pay money to attend to their conferences when the gurus talk about obvious things a five years old could easily figure out for himself.

Posted by Regine 04/10

Those blogs shit me to tears.  I was just checking out Stumbleupon and got shitty that there was about 1 unique interesting thing
in the list.

There is a market out there for productive blogs and yes, the owners are taking advantage of the fact that people can’t use their own brains anymore.
Is it any different then a prostitute taking advantage of the fact that guys are so desperate to get laid that they
will pay? 
I honestly find it pretty sad that people are so dumb. I think its one reason I don’t like them so much.

Posted by Nat 04/10

Lol oh dear, sometimes those blogs amuse me, but mostly I don’t bother reading them. I couldn’t imagine writing an article like that myself!

Posted by Holly 04/10

I have to admit, some of those things are helpful.  There are plenty of sites I read on blog optimization that feature common sense ideas I had never thought of or simply reminded me of things I forgot to do.  Then once in awhile I do read something that changes the way I operate my blog.  Same goes for money making, and I was actually just about to write a post on saving money.

I’d rather read a blog on how to better myself than a blog about how those blogs are dumb. :/

Posted by J 04/10

They are everywhere now! I don’t remember seeing so many blogs with (number) ways to (verb).  I’ve seen some that have useful information, but most of them are just cheap imitations and phail. Badly.

But like Jem said, this is sadly not limited to productivity blogs. A lot of “tutorials” websites are on the same line. There are some good, well written, useful ones - but there are a whole lot more full of crap :P

Posted by Lene 04/10

I was subscribed to Zen Habits until it depressed me. It made me feel unproductive when I wasn’t at all. :P

(And, of course, you’re reading something about procrastination probably because you ARE procrastinating, so it’s all a little odd.)

Posted by Amber 04/11

“Why thank you, Captain Obvious.”
Perhaps the most thought of concoction of words when reading any of said articles. Haha, hillarious - everything you wrote is so true. The internet is full of so much good stuff, and so much junk. What’s worse is half of those articles are probably written by 12 year olds (you know.. the ones with all the worldly experience in life).

Posted by Paddy 04/11

I fully understand the irony of spending tons of time online reading articles on how to be productive.

Anyway, if you ask Rhonda Byrne, the secret to changing your life is to think about it. Everything you want will just come flying at you, and you don’t even have to lift a finger!

Posted by Michelle 04/11

I guess I should be glad I have NEVER stumbled upon a productivity blog. I’m quite enjoying the money that prostitution is bringing in thankyouverymuch!

Posted by SG 04/11

You know what? I’ve never bothered to read any of these type of articles. I don’t like looking at a computer screen and having some random person state stuff I already know I should be doing. It’s like, can we get past the obvious and to the meat of the problem?

Now if I come across a well thought out and researched article on how I can make it through my Quarter Life Crisis that would be helpful forreals. A girl is struggling here.

Posted by Kiera 04/11

I have a tendency to avoid common sense/productivity blogs at all costs. Maybe I’m a little sensitive, but I find them insulting, especially when they’re written in the 2nd person. “1. You need to identify the problem. 2. You need to change it.” It’s like, “o rly? Now, why do you feel the need to explain things to me like I’m 2?”

Posted by Chantelle 04/11

It’s absolutely true. Make-money-blogging (MMOs) and blogs-about-blogging are a GIANT niche nowadays. Everyone wants to follow John Chow’s example and get rich. I hardly even glance at them anymore because they are all pretty much recycled and washed down content.

RE 28 Books in 2008: Yes! Anything you read this year (or anything you started reading in 2007 but will be finishing this year) count as part of the challenge. Welcome aboard!

Posted by Crystal 04/12

Hahahaa.. I agree with Jem about your blogs.

They’re very amusing. ^^ I really enjoy reading them and always get a giggle or amusement from it. ^^_

Posted by 04/12

Heh, I thought it said “33 ways to become a well-liked PRISONER”. See, there’s a free tip for anyone looking to start up a new niche site.

Posted by Renate 04/12

“5 ways to make money without selling your body”
LOL! Next time I want a a few extra bucks, I’ll just use these very helpful tips ;). Haha

Some of these are way too obvious...like the 33 tips to becoming a Well Liked Person. I thought that stuff was common sense!

Posted by Yara 04/12

I liked this: “Identify the thing you want to change about yourself. Decide to change it.”

Maybe it’s just me, but if you’ve identified the thing you want to change, haven’t you already pretty much decided to make some progress towards changing it?

Also, those instructions are so vague. It’s like, How to Perform Brain Surgery: “1. Cut the person’s head open. 2. Cut the brain up. 3. Sew the head back up.” Wow, yes, now I’m a certified brain surgeon!

Posted by Clem 04/12

OOOOOO Give me some of those titles!! I need a good dose of common sense since I was born without it...as have apparently 50,000 other people! *rolls eyes*

Very productive..I applaud you.

Posted by April 04/13

Seriously every “read this article it’ll fix this” all say the same vague things! Some solid here are two ways to do this and this would be nice, rather then think about what you want and do it.... no shit sherlock!

Posted by Elle 04/13

Heyyyyyy Sarai!!!!
How’s it hoeing? I’m SURE you must remember me. I’m Dakota, you reviewed my trailer trash site: so-dakota.com ages ago. Anyway, so-dakota.com is trash, literally. Gone gone gone. I’m still a fully self absorbed author, anyhow.

Sorry, I linked you.
Hope you don’t mind.

By the way, out of interest…

What is your ethnicity? Are you Eurasian like me? :P

Posted by DAKOTA!!! 04/13

‘Make-money-blogging (MMOs) and blogs-about-blogging are a GIANT niche nowadays.’

Can something be classed as a giant niche? I thought the whole point of a niche was that it addresses a small, specific group.

/pedanticism

Posted by Jem 04/19

I sort of see blogs like that as the reason why the blog-o-sphere is so hard to get into these. I personally believe they defeat the purpose of a blog and they make new bloggers think that this is what you should see on a blog… eeerk hate them too

Posted by MK 04/21

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