Dear Lady In The Parking Lot

March 03, 2008 · Filed under: Personal.

Today two friends and I went to a store to window shop. While walking towards our automobile we walk by your mini van, trunk open since you’re loading it. One of my friends just happens to be smoking a cigarette just as we pass your vehicle, and out of the corner of my eye I see you turn around. I think nothing of it, until you decide to open your stupid mouth.

You call out something along the lines of: “Pfft, I bet you’re not old enough to be smoking that thing.”

Now, I wasn’t really paying attention to what you were saying. After all, it’s very cold and I just want to get my brown ass into the pick-up, but your snide tone automatically made me think you were a flaming douchebag. Almost like a little bell went off in my brain. Not surprisingly, your little comment gets immediate reactions from my two friends, and they aren’t friendly, yet you just don’t seem to understand that:

1) You are way out of line,
2) You shouldn’t be concerned about a person you didn’t push out of your vagina, and
3) You need to shut the fuck up.

I just don’t understand what the hell would possess you, or anyone for that matter, to say such things when it’s not your goddamn business. My friend is more than old enough, thank you, but that isn’t the point. Until my friend decides to shove a pack of cigarettes down your throat (and believe me, nothing would have made me happier than to witness such a thing), it is not your concern.

I don’t know who you think you are—part of the Youth Police that lives inside that Dipshit World you seem to thrive in, perhaps? Whatever world you live in (I promise you, it’s not Earth), I hope you come crashing down real soon. Frankly, by making that little comment, you only succeeded in making yourself look like an ignorant asshole. I sincerely hope you continue to spread around that dumbassity you hold so dear, and that one day someone will have the balls to stick something so far down your throat it comes shooting out of your flabby ass.

And I, along with the rest of the world, will thank them for it.
- Sarai

Oh and P.S.: I hope you die in a drive-by.